Alright guys and gals welcome back to... *Quiet* What is this again?
I don't know I completely forgot...
Looks like a wrestling ring.
Something about fighting I guess.
Well there's a kid and an old man standing in the ring maybe it's some kind of new years thing...
The crowd seems confused too...
Huh well I guess whatever it is is canceled. *Loud again* Sorry guys seems to be some sort of technical difficulty... or something. Looks like whatever this was will be canceled until further notice.
Wednesday 29 February 2012
Tuesday 28 February 2012
Eighth Match
It's time for the Eighth Match! C.U.T.E. versus THE SHADOWGRAPH- I mean Nightlanders! Wait I don't see them... C.U.T.E. is just standing alone in the darkness... speaking of why aren't the lights on?
They are?
The Nightlanders are living shadows?
Oh...
Well sorry I wasn't exactly briefed on all this before that other idiot got himself camperfied...
Anyways so yeah...
*Bell rings*
The match has started and! nothing is happening... Well not really nothing. C.U.T.E. is frantically punching the ground and the ground seems to be moving or at least the shadows on the ground are moving but nothing else seems to be happening.
Wait The shadows er nightlanders are rising up now and... Wow those are big claws... C.U.T.E.'s attacks aren't having any effect but The Nightlanders attacks sure are. Wait something strange is happening... A Door has just appeared in the center of the ring! Somethings stepping out of The Door! It's... A pitch black C.U.T.E.? Wait no it's a Nightlander version of C.U.T.E.! I think C.U.T.E. may be in serious trouble here! But wait The Nightlander!C.U.T.E. is beating up the Nightlanders. C.U.T.E. is leaving the ring. He's sitting in the audience. He's chatting with his fans! Meanwhile The Nightlander!C.U.T.E. is just wailing on the nightlanders! I have no idea what's going on but The Nightlanders are fleeing for their lives. C.U.T.E. Er nightlander!C.U.T.E. and I guess by extension normal C.U.T.E. has won!
They are?
The Nightlanders are living shadows?
Oh...
Well sorry I wasn't exactly briefed on all this before that other idiot got himself camperfied...
Anyways so yeah...
*Bell rings*
The match has started and! nothing is happening... Well not really nothing. C.U.T.E. is frantically punching the ground and the ground seems to be moving or at least the shadows on the ground are moving but nothing else seems to be happening.
Wait The shadows er nightlanders are rising up now and... Wow those are big claws... C.U.T.E.'s attacks aren't having any effect but The Nightlanders attacks sure are. Wait something strange is happening... A Door has just appeared in the center of the ring! Somethings stepping out of The Door! It's... A pitch black C.U.T.E.? Wait no it's a Nightlander version of C.U.T.E.! I think C.U.T.E. may be in serious trouble here! But wait The Nightlander!C.U.T.E. is beating up the Nightlanders. C.U.T.E. is leaving the ring. He's sitting in the audience. He's chatting with his fans! Meanwhile The Nightlander!C.U.T.E. is just wailing on the nightlanders! I have no idea what's going on but The Nightlanders are fleeing for their lives. C.U.T.E. Er nightlander!C.U.T.E. and I guess by extension normal C.U.T.E. has won!
Monday 27 February 2012
Seventh Match
Alright guys and girls it's time for the *Stentorian voice* Seventh Match of The Century!
It's C.U.T.E. versus The Evolutionary Adverse Trigger!
*Chorus of confused sounds from the audience*
Er... EAT
*Sounds of recognition*
God this audience is dumb... Wait did I just say that into the Mic?! Um...
ANYWAYS! EAT couldn't be here herself so she sent some of her arms. That's right it's C.U.T.E. versus EAT by proxy via The Camper. About 50 of them it seems...
*Bell rings*
The fight has started and The Camper have charged C.U.T.E. trying to overwhelm him with numbers. It's insane C.U.T.E. is fighting them all off at once and- *Muffled voice away from Mic* Oh um thanks random fan. Yes I was getting a little parched thank you. *Quiet drinking sounds* Anyways yes C.U.T.E. is figthting them all and doing pretty well. But wait The Camper seem to be mutating now! They're... Growing *Thumping sound and silence* *Muffled agitated voices* Dang it the idiot got himself infected. Sigh someone needs to go replace him. Him go someone replace to needs dang. Copying. Started he copying has... Him out here get... *Cleared throat* Ahem alright uh we had a slight issue but that's rectified I'll be replacing the other announcer for um... Indefinitely anyways back to the match. The evolved Camper are beating the hell out of C.U.T.E. They're just wailing on him. They aren't even giving him a chance to defend himself. He's down and they're still beating him. Wait he's saying something. I can't quite make it out. Sounds like... Teaching jobs for everyone? Huh? The Camper are letting up and they seem to be conversing with C.U.T.E. about something. They're shaking hands and The Camper are leaving... I... Um... I guess C.U.T.E. wins?
It's C.U.T.E. versus The Evolutionary Adverse Trigger!
*Chorus of confused sounds from the audience*
Er... EAT
*Sounds of recognition*
God this audience is dumb... Wait did I just say that into the Mic?! Um...
ANYWAYS! EAT couldn't be here herself so she sent some of her arms. That's right it's C.U.T.E. versus EAT by proxy via The Camper. About 50 of them it seems...
*Bell rings*
The fight has started and The Camper have charged C.U.T.E. trying to overwhelm him with numbers. It's insane C.U.T.E. is fighting them all off at once and- *Muffled voice away from Mic* Oh um thanks random fan. Yes I was getting a little parched thank you. *Quiet drinking sounds* Anyways yes C.U.T.E. is figthting them all and doing pretty well. But wait The Camper seem to be mutating now! They're... Growing *Thumping sound and silence* *Muffled agitated voices* Dang it the idiot got himself infected. Sigh someone needs to go replace him. Him go someone replace to needs dang. Copying. Started he copying has... Him out here get... *Cleared throat* Ahem alright uh we had a slight issue but that's rectified I'll be replacing the other announcer for um... Indefinitely anyways back to the match. The evolved Camper are beating the hell out of C.U.T.E. They're just wailing on him. They aren't even giving him a chance to defend himself. He's down and they're still beating him. Wait he's saying something. I can't quite make it out. Sounds like... Teaching jobs for everyone? Huh? The Camper are letting up and they seem to be conversing with C.U.T.E. about something. They're shaking hands and The Camper are leaving... I... Um... I guess C.U.T.E. wins?
Thursday 23 February 2012
Sixth Match
Welc- *Static* to The *static* of the *Static*
Will someb *Static* Fix this damn *Static*
Wait the newborn *Static* My Microphone?!
Oh god!
Ok I have a new microphone.
Today is the day guys. Man versus Machine!
C.U.T.E. versus My microphone! I mean The Manufactured Newborn!
The newborn is just a microphone and stand at the moment though so this shouldn't be too difficult...
*The bell rings*
The match has started and for once C.U.T.E. strikes first. Wait something is wrong! C.U.T.E. is recoiling but his arm isn't. Oh my The Manufactured Newborn absorbed C.U.T.E.'s arm and is now devouring the ring. How can C.U.T.E. fight something he can't touch and that will merely absorb anything he throws at it?
Wait is that a teddy bear?! Yes C.U.T.E. has produced a teddy bear and thrown it at the Newborn! The Newborn is absorbing the teddy bear. What's C.U.T.E.'s plan here? Oh my The Teddy Bear is expanding and covering The Newborn. The Newborn is now... A giant Teddy Bear? What the? Oh wait it is a newborn... I guess it likes Teddy Bears... What now though? C.U.T.E. seems just as confused as me.
The Newborn seems to have stopped absorbing at least... Wait C.U.T.E. seems to have an idea! He's approaching The Newborn... He just punched The Newborn in it's plushy pink face! The Newborn is down! C.U.T.E. has won?
Whatever moving on...
Will someb *Static* Fix this damn *Static*
Wait the newborn *Static* My Microphone?!
Oh god!
Ok I have a new microphone.
Today is the day guys. Man versus Machine!
C.U.T.E. versus My microphone! I mean The Manufactured Newborn!
The newborn is just a microphone and stand at the moment though so this shouldn't be too difficult...
*The bell rings*
The match has started and for once C.U.T.E. strikes first. Wait something is wrong! C.U.T.E. is recoiling but his arm isn't. Oh my The Manufactured Newborn absorbed C.U.T.E.'s arm and is now devouring the ring. How can C.U.T.E. fight something he can't touch and that will merely absorb anything he throws at it?
Wait is that a teddy bear?! Yes C.U.T.E. has produced a teddy bear and thrown it at the Newborn! The Newborn is absorbing the teddy bear. What's C.U.T.E.'s plan here? Oh my The Teddy Bear is expanding and covering The Newborn. The Newborn is now... A giant Teddy Bear? What the? Oh wait it is a newborn... I guess it likes Teddy Bears... What now though? C.U.T.E. seems just as confused as me.
The Newborn seems to have stopped absorbing at least... Wait C.U.T.E. seems to have an idea! He's approaching The Newborn... He just punched The Newborn in it's plushy pink face! The Newborn is down! C.U.T.E. has won?
Whatever moving on...
Wednesday 22 February 2012
Fifth Match
Alright! It's time for the next match. Who's up to challenge C.U.T.E. now. It's none other than... THE CONVOCATION!
*Loud chorus of squawks serving as The entrance theme as A figure wearing a cloak made of feathers walks into the ring*
*The figure scans the crowd and then suddenly yells*
Caw Caw I'm a bird motherfucker!
*The figure then splits apart into hundreds of blackbirds which fly above the ring*
Wasn't that an amazing entrance!
*Bell rings*
Oh The Convocation started the match by zapping C.U.T.E. with a lightning bolt but he's just shrugging it off like nothing.
He's dodging the lightning now! Wow look at him move. The birds are still firing lightning at him but some have started dive bombing him. Oh he's grabbed one and- is he about too!- Oh my god he just ate that bird! Really?
The Convocation even seem disturbed.
Wait where did C.U.T.E. get a machine gun?!
Oh wow he's gunning down the birds! They've recovered from their shock and their dive bombing him again but he's just dodging and firing. Their numbers are dwindling rapidly! This could be it folks! There's only one bird left but C.U.T.E. seems to be out of bullets. What's going to happen now?!
The bird is staying out of reach. C.U.T.E. can't reach it and it's not willing to come down. However it doesn't seem to be able to... Wait a minute... Oh... Um ahem it seems that bird is not part of the convocation it's a sparrow that somehow found it's way into the ring. The Janitors are clearing it out now. C.U.T.E. won!
*Loud chorus of squawks serving as The entrance theme as A figure wearing a cloak made of feathers walks into the ring*
*The figure scans the crowd and then suddenly yells*
Caw Caw I'm a bird motherfucker!
*The figure then splits apart into hundreds of blackbirds which fly above the ring*
Wasn't that an amazing entrance!
*Bell rings*
Oh The Convocation started the match by zapping C.U.T.E. with a lightning bolt but he's just shrugging it off like nothing.
He's dodging the lightning now! Wow look at him move. The birds are still firing lightning at him but some have started dive bombing him. Oh he's grabbed one and- is he about too!- Oh my god he just ate that bird! Really?
The Convocation even seem disturbed.
Wait where did C.U.T.E. get a machine gun?!
Oh wow he's gunning down the birds! They've recovered from their shock and their dive bombing him again but he's just dodging and firing. Their numbers are dwindling rapidly! This could be it folks! There's only one bird left but C.U.T.E. seems to be out of bullets. What's going to happen now?!
The bird is staying out of reach. C.U.T.E. can't reach it and it's not willing to come down. However it doesn't seem to be able to... Wait a minute... Oh... Um ahem it seems that bird is not part of the convocation it's a sparrow that somehow found it's way into the ring. The Janitors are clearing it out now. C.U.T.E. won!
Tuesday 21 February 2012
Fourth Match
It's Time for C.U.T.E. to face off against The Wooden Girl!
The Wooden girl would like to point out before the match starts that she's always looking for more servants and that the people in the third row seats 17 and 19 should remember that when deciding whether or not to bet against her.
Right... On with the match!
*Bell rings*
It's on and oh no C.U.T.E. is already in trouble.
He's caught in her strings.
Uh oh I think this is- Yes it's The Wooden Girl's special move The Stop Hitting Yourself!
C.U.T.E. seems to be in trouble!
Wait! Amazing Cute is resisting the strings! I didn't even know that was possible!
Where did he get a flamethrower!?
Oh my he's burning The Wooden Girl!
Heh guess that's the downside of being made of wood...
Looks like this fight is over. Can anything stop C.U.T.E. it seems unlikely.
The Wooden girl would like to point out before the match starts that she's always looking for more servants and that the people in the third row seats 17 and 19 should remember that when deciding whether or not to bet against her.
Right... On with the match!
*Bell rings*
It's on and oh no C.U.T.E. is already in trouble.
He's caught in her strings.
Uh oh I think this is- Yes it's The Wooden Girl's special move The Stop Hitting Yourself!
C.U.T.E. seems to be in trouble!
Wait! Amazing Cute is resisting the strings! I didn't even know that was possible!
Where did he get a flamethrower!?
Oh my he's burning The Wooden Girl!
Heh guess that's the downside of being made of wood...
Looks like this fight is over. Can anything stop C.U.T.E. it seems unlikely.
Sunday 19 February 2012
Third Match
The next challenger is The king of ice, The coolest kid you know it's The Cold Boy!
Oh geez! It just got really cold in here. I'll be right b... b... back after I g... g... get a j... j... jacket.
Ok I'm back! C.U.T.E. seems to be feeling the cold as well. The Cold Boy is just standing there.
C.U.T.E. is completely frozen he can't move.
Hmm it would seem the buildings automatic heating system has turned on.
The Cold Boy is complaining about unfairness and discrimination.
C.U.T.E. says too bad with a face shattering punch and I mean that literally.
Well that was easy.
Great Job C.U.T.E.
Oh geez! It just got really cold in here. I'll be right b... b... back after I g... g... get a j... j... jacket.
Ok I'm back! C.U.T.E. seems to be feeling the cold as well. The Cold Boy is just standing there.
C.U.T.E. is completely frozen he can't move.
Hmm it would seem the buildings automatic heating system has turned on.
The Cold Boy is complaining about unfairness and discrimination.
C.U.T.E. says too bad with a face shattering punch and I mean that literally.
Well that was easy.
Great Job C.U.T.E.
Saturday 18 February 2012
Round 2
It's time for Round 2!
C.U.T.E. versus... Hulk Hogan? Wait it's The Archangel!
I thought Hulk Hogan was still alive?
*The Archangel smiles*
Okay then...
Good luck out there C.U.T.E.
*Bell sounds*
The fight has started!
Hulk- I mean The Archangel starts off the match immediately with some sort of strange flying tackle. C.U.T.E. is on the ropes! The archangel has him in a headlock! Oh C.U.T.E. got in a groin shot! Low blow...
The archangel is backing away to recover. Wait where the hell did he get a shotgun! Look out C.U.T.E. He's dived out of the ring! The archangel is still shooting! Woah watch it! Don't shoot me! Oh god C.U.T.E. is running through the audience now! All these deaths are going to make for a very hefty lawsuit I'm sure. At least they would if everyone here didn't sign those waivers. Thank you legal department.
Wait C.U.T.E. has disappeared in the excitement! The archangel seems confused as well.
Woah! What an amazing move! C.U.T.E. somehow got behind the ring and popped out behind The Archangel. They're wrestling for the gun. Oh another groin shot! C.U.T.E. has the gun and... Boom! Headshot!
C.U.T.E. Wins!
C.U.T.E. versus... Hulk Hogan? Wait it's The Archangel!
I thought Hulk Hogan was still alive?
*The Archangel smiles*
Okay then...
Good luck out there C.U.T.E.
*Bell sounds*
The fight has started!
Hulk- I mean The Archangel starts off the match immediately with some sort of strange flying tackle. C.U.T.E. is on the ropes! The archangel has him in a headlock! Oh C.U.T.E. got in a groin shot! Low blow...
The archangel is backing away to recover. Wait where the hell did he get a shotgun! Look out C.U.T.E. He's dived out of the ring! The archangel is still shooting! Woah watch it! Don't shoot me! Oh god C.U.T.E. is running through the audience now! All these deaths are going to make for a very hefty lawsuit I'm sure. At least they would if everyone here didn't sign those waivers. Thank you legal department.
Wait C.U.T.E. has disappeared in the excitement! The archangel seems confused as well.
Woah! What an amazing move! C.U.T.E. somehow got behind the ring and popped out behind The Archangel. They're wrestling for the gun. Oh another groin shot! C.U.T.E. has the gun and... Boom! Headshot!
C.U.T.E. Wins!
Friday 17 February 2012
First Match!
The first exciting Match! C.U.T.E. versus The Dying Man!
C.U.T.E. might be at a disadvantage here since The Dying Man has been known to K.O. opponents just by touching them.
*Starting bell*
C.U.T.E. is wisely keeping his distance and dodging The Dying Man's attempts to touch him. Wait he's got a bat. Where did he get a bat? Oh shit he's beating on The Dying Man. The Dying Man is down but he's still trying to touch C.U.T.E.'s feet but Cute isn't having any of that and he's just wailing on him! Oh I think he just crushed his skull... I guess that's it for the first round...
Next time will be The Archangel!
C.U.T.E. might be at a disadvantage here since The Dying Man has been known to K.O. opponents just by touching them.
*Starting bell*
C.U.T.E. is wisely keeping his distance and dodging The Dying Man's attempts to touch him. Wait he's got a bat. Where did he get a bat? Oh shit he's beating on The Dying Man. The Dying Man is down but he's still trying to touch C.U.T.E.'s feet but Cute isn't having any of that and he's just wailing on him! Oh I think he just crushed his skull... I guess that's it for the first round...
Next time will be The Archangel!
Thursday 16 February 2012
Ladies and not so Gentlemen!
You've waited for it all your life and now the moment has arrived!
It's him the reigning champion of the ring Cute- Er I mean Crushing Unstoppable Tornado Erris!
*Crowd cheers*
C.U.T.E. will be taking on his greatest challengers ever!
THE FEARS!!!!!!
*Crowd Boos*
*Crowd is slaughtered by Slender tentacles*
It's all happening tonight Folks! Don't miss it!
It's him the reigning champion of the ring Cute- Er I mean Crushing Unstoppable Tornado Erris!
*Crowd cheers*
C.U.T.E. will be taking on his greatest challengers ever!
THE FEARS!!!!!!
*Crowd Boos*
*Crowd is slaughtered by Slender tentacles*
It's all happening tonight Folks! Don't miss it!
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